Apr 24 08
The Facebook Experiment: Part 1
By Dave Imperiale
I felt legitimate fear when I clicked the button to upload my profile on Facebook about a month ago. That fear was immediately warranted when my first friend sent me my first note saying: “You probably don’t want to put your cell phone number on your profile.”
Since then my foray into the world of social networking has been a whirlwind of promise, uncertainty and confusion. And I’ve been loving every anticipatory minute I’ve spent on there. In there? I had two friend requests waiting for me already as soon as I arrived. Not sure how that works. It certainly exemplifies part of the creepiness. But those two friends led to about fifteen more in the first couple of days. These were people I have pretty consistent contact with so it wasn’t that thrilling. The email notifications were annoying me and a friend explained how to shut that off.
I got busy after that and didn’t check for a few days. When I did make it back, I had no more new friends. I didn’t think anything of it. Another few days passed with the same result. Now I’m worried. I turned to my colleague thinking the experiment was over and I’m a complete loser. She wheeled her chair over. After a familiar look she clicked on the word “Facebook.” My digital ignorance was once again illuminated…I had been checking my profile page for over a week. Then the frenzy began.
Dozens of friend requests. Multiple notifications. One from a vampire that wanted to bite me. Confirming those friends led to dozens more. I’m reconnecting with people I forgot existed. As a guy, there’s definitely a little High Fidelity thing going on. I’m enjoying myself. The wheels finally come off when I get “poked” by a girl I don’t know. I’m excited and dubious.
Poked? I begin asking people what to do and what it means. I didn’t think Facebook was for dating. The consensus is that it’s flattering. Poked. Really Facebook? That’s the word you use for this? Let’s use it in a sentence: “I poked a girl on Facebook.” I debated. In the end, this being an experiment and all, I totally poked her back. I felt nothing, especially because nothing ever happened after that. Completely unsatisfying.
This leads me to my biggest problem with Facebook: the lack of communication. I understand the concept of a college “Facebook.” I had one. We used to look for all the pretty girls and invite them to our parties. But the core of this online Facebook seems to be about amassing friends. I think for the millennials it’s about staying connecting and possibly meeting new people. For my generation and older it seems to be more about re-connecting.
Yet when the majority of people make a new friend request, and mind you these are mostly people you haven’t spoken to in years, they don’t even include a note. The option is there to include a note. You just get a request and no note. I’ve been fairly passive in my friend building, but when I do see someone I want to add as a friend I try to at least ask how they’re doing. Tell them I’m in New York. Something. Otherwise, what the hell is everyone doing? I wonder if the younger folk include a note when they make a Facebook friend. I’m not sure why this is the protocol. Maybe I haven’t spent enough time on there yet. Maybe in our early thirties we already have enough people in our lives and all we really want to do is see how poorly everyone else is aging. Maybe we’re just too old for this. More to come on Facebook. .I.
Tags: facebook, millennials
Having just joined Facebook myself about a month ago, I have experienced a lot of what you talk about here. Friends I barely remember from high school, people I barely hung out with in college, and a collection of other randoms have all managed to find me. And, despite my girlfriend bothering me with tales of “poking” or “pirating” or all the other crazy “activities” that can be found on facebook, I have found myself addicted to collecting information on people I haven’t seen for years. While, I haven’t gotten the gumption to actually “poke” anyone yet, it just seems a bit pornographic, I am certainly ready to send some hatching eggs or become a ninja or do some pirate battling with any of you.